Tuesday, October 7

Nutty Natters

Its pouring elephants and camels... And I’m a nervous wreck! The lightning’s scaring me to death, and the din of the showers is masking all other sounds. Is this the phase of October heat, or is it the onset of the winter, or is this the pent-up fury of the monsoons? (Whoever’s singing the Raag Malhar, take it ez buddy. U’ll bring the city down!)

Thanks all u people for ur kind and dreadful remarks, suggestions and criticisms. The blog’s grown, I’ve grown, and as I heard somewhr - Watever doesn’t destroy me only makes me stronger...

I’m learning, life’s teaching me a million things. Do I seem wiser? I’m eatin a lot of walnuts these days... (Said to improve the brain, u dumbheads! Go, get some rite this instant! You need them more than I do...)

I saw Kidnap over the weekend (“Kidnaeep” in the Hindi script). And I wonder y I even saw it (It got an awful rating in the Sunday newspaper)... (Walnuts don’t work in all areas at all times, I guess)... Courtesy Sanju baba? He’s a dud in the film. For Imran Khan? Aamir mus b contemplating suicide being uncle to dis pokerfaced punk. Enticed by Minissha? She does titillate the audiences wid her cleavage-revealing dresses (or “undresses” to be more precise), but she only made me yelp wid disgust at her horrendous dialogue delivery. Cud it b for Vidya Malawade – the smart young goal-keeper frm ChakDe who poses as the angry, independent mom to an equally young daughter? She manages to retain a constipated expression on her face throughout the movie (jus like v managed to emerge frm the movie theatre alive). Maybe for the unknown-but-expected plot? A young boy rashly sentenced to imprisonment for an unintended felony seeks revenge from his wealthy, successful detractor. How? By kidnapping his daughter, and making him run around like a crazy chimpanzee doin weird antics. Point noted. Sanjay Gadhvi said he wudn’t hav made the film had Sanjay Dutt refusd to act in it. I’m speculating wat made Sanjubaba say yes to this catastrophe... Was he lookin at dis as a comeback vehicle? He mus hav been in a state of delusion at the time he signed this one... I’m wonderin wat will be Urmila’s fate whn her Karzzzzzzzzz (...and some more zzzz.... Himesh’s remake of the golden Rishi Kapoor hit; anodr fiasco in the making) and EMI (a multi-starrer that sounds promising) hit the screens...

I went thru some interesting episodes related to
vehicles and traffic this week (so, wats new, u claim?!) Everything. Coz after getting caught and fined for an expired PUC certificate, I got a new PUC widout even havin my bike checked for the purpose/process! I sincerely went to the petrol pump PUC stand and obediently forked out 30 bux to the guy wielding the PUC slip book. He finished filling the pretty green slip, and handed it over to me. I was waiting for him to insert that pipe (or whatever) in my bike’s silencer (or whatever, who cares about the goddamn jargon!) but nothing doing... He walked away and left me standing astounded, amused and a tad annoyed. Where is the country heading, folks? Now I know how the furiously irritating kinetics, tempos, buses and trucks manage to get off despite of the clouds of smoke billowin outta their vehicles that mask, plaster and layer riders’ faces...

Another observation was the ultra-cool method to identify and prove unruly two-wheeler parking... In old days, the scene went like this - The snazzy blue truck, conspicuous in its unfussiness, hurtles to a stop near the offender’s bike parked outside the designated area. The team inside (probably the most efficient, hardworking and earnest employees in the world!) jumps out even before the vehicle has stopd, and wid marvelous ease props the bike up to get carted off to the nearest police station. Now the process is the same, except for one small change. One of the blue men video-shoots the location of the bike and the nearest white line boundary, recording the obviousness of the rider’s folly and the necessity/appropriateness of the tow-away action. It looked remarkable as the rest of the team waited patiently for the shooting to be done, and got bac to business!

A funny thin dat hapd was after picking up one bike, the team was debating and contemplating wat to do wid anodr lawbreaking scooter. But dat’s exactly wat contemplating means - u never know which direction the tide will turn... A young boy who was about to rejoice his witty behavior when asked if he was the owner of that oder scooter, had his smart grin wiped out as the team took off wid his vehicle aftr sum heated thinking and discussion. (Guilty, my lord! I could’ve prevented this had I called out to him and told him he was parking outside the border. Naseeb apna apna)

I finished
Six Suspects. Vikas Swarup, pls stop writing, take a break, and return whn u hav sumthin fresh and appealing in mind. Of the 470-odd pages, I enjoyed less than 50 pages in the book (those dat spoke of the actress and her diaries). The scheme builds up well, but the end is an anti-climax. Turns out it is the reporter who actually fires the terminal shot, but most of the characters are either accused of the act, or they believ in their own role as the murderer. I am so infuriated that way the book has ended! I expected much better... Anoder 500 bux down the drain... Anoder one-book wonder proclaimed and hailed and forgotten...

Looks like this post is nuthin but izzat-ka-bhaji-pala (or izzat-ka-kachra, in simpler terms) for the mentioned entities/topics. So, leme end here before I do any further damage with my political impropriety... Can’t get on the wrong side of people so publicly!

On a positive note, I’m now listed on Indiblogger, so hopefully I’ll get more hits and comments ;-) JK (Jus Kiddin, freakos! Havnt u got those walnuts, yet?!)... It’s a great forum and its amazing to c so many Indians bloggin away to glory! Also, started Memory Keeper’s Daughter. Gobbled down 20 pages, and leme tell u its fascinating! Absolutely un-put-down-able. The literary style, the moving words, the engaging narrative. I think m gona enjoy this one... 401 pages in all, 381 to go... What’s it about? Shall tell ya next time!

Asta-la-vista baby!
Anuja

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