You're my Honey Bun, Omi!

Never told you about my family history, did I?

I’m talking about “family” in the nuclear sense, because I have neither the time and energy, nor the data and enthusiasm to write about all the people and details that came before that.

So… My family used to consist of 4 people in till 2007. My parents got married in 1979 and had a handsome, naughty boy in 1980 followed by an intelligent, sensible, caring, smart, adorable girl (guess who?) in 1985. (So now you know my age, happy?!! Maybe not! ROFL)

My bro wed a sweet, nice girl in 2007 and thereafter, I had to correct myself each time I uttered “Aap teeno” or “Hum chaaro”… Sudhir, Madhu (originally Madhulika), Anand, Shruti, Anuja… The Famous Five.

That was till Feb 9, 2010.

Starting Feb 10, 2010, the Rathi family comprises 6 individuals – 3 men and 3 women. God’s sense of fairness and equivalence!

Yessss… My family was gifted a baby boy by the Lord. A bundle of joy that came into my family and multiplied our hope and happiness a thousand-fold! Oh my god, he’s so cute, I can’t tell you. Fair and good-looking like my brother, features as sharp as mine and what’s more, he has the ability to set us all racing with a shriek, sob or whimper.

We haven’t named him yet – he was born in the Mul Nakshatra, and his Janma Akshar are Bh, Dh, Fa and something equally inconvenient. So, all of us who had names ready for his christening now have to scratch our heads and use our networks and surfing skills to come up with a name that he wouldn’t be ashamed of owning up to. (Badmash baby! Aate hi sab ko kaam pe laga diya…) Temporarily and consensually, we’ve agreed on Omansh. Unique name, eh?

Omansh Anand Rathi – the OAR of the Rathi boat!

I was actually wondering how to relate this experience to you. And what better way can there be, I thought, than picking up some quotes online and using them to express exactly what I see and feel at home?

Here’s the first :

A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for - Anonymous

The author is unknown, but I bet all of us who have ever interacted with a baby and its family know the precision and veracity behind this statement. Me and my brother who didn’t see eye to eye before the baby came now murmur in approval when the other does something that calms the baby or makes him smile. I can’t wait to get home after work and play with the angel, happily sacrificing my time with the friends and colleagues. (Yeah, he sleeps most hours of the day, so I end up talking to myself more often that to him, but I enjoy it nevertheless.) I don’t scream for silence when there’s pandemonium in the house like I used to. (Gosh, I was a terror feared by my family and servants! But with the baby at home, I know who’s boss. Gladly.)

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one – Leo J. Burke

Clever chap, Burke… The kiddo is our prince and we are all servants, waiting on him hand and foot. So, if he moves a limb, one of us pounces to see if he’s not comfortable, and if he moves his lips, one of us whispers to ask if he’s starving. If he cries, the person handling him has to face the music!

A perfect example of minority rule is a baby in the house - Milwaukee Journal
Having a baby dragged me, kicking and screaming, from the world of self-absorption - Paul Reiser

The Maharaja that he is, baccha doesn’t let our affection and worry hassle him. He sleeps on… well over 16 hours a day I should think! Obviously, his resting does not imply we can put our feet up with ease, coz he gets hungry and wets his clothes without even bothering to wake up. So, we need to keep checking irrespective of his wakefulness or declaration. And the most interesting part is, I, who values my sleep so much, get up with a jolt at the dead of night and rush to the baby if I as much as hear him sighing… That’s what a child in the family does to the toughest of us all… Abba and Ammi also visit us more frequently… The house is often full and bustling with energy… Thanks to Omu! Man, I love him! And my mum, I think she’s hardly slept these two weeks since the cute fairy came home to live with us… The poor darling. Love her, too… A little more :-)

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing - Kin Hubbard

Ahem, no comments.

Hahaha... Sorry Bhabhi… You know I’m kidding. I love the way you love the baby. It shows in your eyes and your face when you look at him. Congrats, girl! You’ve made us all very happy and proud. Muaaaahhh! Love you…

Having a baby changes the way you view your in-laws. I love it when they come to visit now. They can hold the baby and I can go out - Matthew Broderick

Hehe. This is true at times when I really have an urgent or attractive commitment. For example, when I need to get ready for work, I thank my lucky stars that there is someone else to take care of the baby. At other times, I can’t bear to share the baby with anyone else – not even his dad or mine!

If your baby is "beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time," you're the grandma! - Theresa Bloomingdale

Right, Mum?!! Stop fretting about our baby. He’s a fine boy and he’s going to be bright and healthy and illustrious just like his Aunt Anuja ;-)

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body - Elizabeth Stone

Don’t need to tell you that hum sab ke dil ka tukda hai wo. When he cries, all of us rush to him and scold the one handling him, be it his mom who’s devotedly feeding him or the maid who’s massaging him lovingly. Sucha lucky boy! He twists all us adamant and egoistic Rathis on his little finger. Ab Rathi hai, toh ziddi to hoga hi… Hehehe.

A baby changes your dinner party conversation from politics to poops - Maurice Johnstone

Baby ne aaj ye kiya, baby dekho kaise kar raha hai, baby is smiling! That’s all we speak day in day out nowadays. Mum manages to ask me how my day was at work, but all the rest of us can see, think, feel is baboo, baboo, baboo… He’s the apple of our eyes. Nazar na lage mere bacche ko!

Aahhh… I could go on for ever and ever about my sweetie pie, cootchie coo, sugarplum. He makes me feel so many emotions at one and the same time… The first time I picked him up, I was anxious about being able to handle him correctly and I was also enchanted to feel his soft, warm skin. I was filled with marvel at how a tiny, living thing had grown inside my sis-in-law’s womb, and also angry when someone spoke anything belittling him. I feared his wellbeing when he was kept in the NICU, and I celebrated his homecoming…

Oh baby, you make me feel alive… You make me feel so different…

Thanks for enriching our lives and hearts. We love you, for now and forever.

I pray God gives you a long, healthy, happy, wealthy, successful life and all your desires come true.

Aatya’s always gona be by your side.

My everlasting promise to you, cuddly-wuddly pixie!

-Anuja Buaa

P.S. : And guess what?!! This blog has been chosen as one of BlogAdda's Spicy Saturday Picks... Omi, you're famous already baby! Thanks, Harish and the BA crew :-)