In My World...

Hi there fellas,

It’s been a while since I last wrote… About me I mean. Directly and autobiographically.

Truth be told, there was so much happening that I was too exhausted physically and mentally to sit down and write about it.

Work’s been taking a toll on me as life professionally does not seem at a great high. I’m doing the same old and trying to kick the boredom out by seeking the novel and un-monotonous. Not been too successful, so biding my time until circumstances are more opportune and bright. As they say, sometimes you just gotta wait… coz there’s nothing else you can do.

Did I tell you I holidayed in Goa in Feb? Spent a week there, didn’t wana come back. It was terrific. Having sightseen all of the state, there was little left for me to do apart from relax. That’s exactly what I meant to do. I spent half the week on the bed in my hotel, catching up on sleep and lazing around. The remaining half was obviously spent in shacks and on the beach relishing the sight of the waves and the delicious food and drinks. A week passed in the blink of an eye; nostalgia grips me as I live through each drab day back at the grind.

The fun bit is, I read barely a page of the book that I’d carried with me, intending to finish. This is remarkably unbelievable, given the readaholic I am. I have no clue how those 24 hours in a day rushed past, or how an entire week obliterated in a matter of seconds. Playing Angry Birds at Aggie’s on Calangute beach and roaming on an FZ through the lanes that led to Fort Aguada, playing with the water and sipping mindblowing coffee at German Bakery (yeah!! GB !!), a luxurious dinner at After Seven with a delightful host, chatting in the lively Baga beach lane and marvelling at the changes at the Flying Dolphin shack that I visited about 5 years ago on my maiden trip to Goa… Feb 11 to Feb 18 – shan’t forget you for a long time to come, and will come back to refresh memories as soon as I possibly can!!

Before leaving for my much needed vacation, I appeared for the final exam in Spanish. Not surprisingly, I scored 95% marks and aced the class. Call me nerd, geek or what you may, I barely studied, and yet was confident that I would do well. In fact, I promised myself to take it easy and not worry about marks (being the achievement-oriented good girl of my parents who makes them proud in every test or challenge). I wasn’t learning Spanish for an enviable mark-sheet; I was learning the language coz I was enamoured by it, and had been planning to do something new for a long time now.

The classes were heaps of fun, and I loved the jokes that I shared with my professor Mandar and my classmates Joyce, Vedika, and others. Teasing Amit, Zareen and Prajakta was never difficult, and the project display with Neerav and Hameet was a reminder of our school day presentations. Preparing for the cultural fest and studying for the tests and exams was enjoyable as well, and now, at the end of it all, I really miss those weekends when I got distressed coz I had to wake up early for class. Of course, now, without the practice and exposure, I’ve kinda lost touch with the language, but I still feel excited when I hear or see anything Spanish. Some connection, I guess.

I watched Kahaani last weekend, and I must admit, I can’t hate Vidya Balan anymore. Ask me why I want to hate her, and I don’t know how to answer that. But I was grossed out by the Silk Smita movie, and she is too bold for my liking. Yet, her acting is admirable, and I am reminded of Bhool Bhullaiya where she has delivered a fantastic performance. Given the scarcity of good female talent in Bollywood, I sure think she has arrived. She’s anyday better than Kareena, Sonakshi, Sonam and all the other newbies. Even Katrina is good to ogle at, but disappoints in terms of acting. Well well, that’s quite some praise, eh? Coming from me, Vidya’s definitely earned it :-)

I continue to read Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged. I started reading quite a while ago, but hey, the book’s 1000 pages long, and I haven’t had too much spare time. Besides, it’s a heavy book, and I’m savoring every page. The characters are so dignified and strong – I wish I was half like them, uncaring about people and their opinions, confident about their own ambition and choices. I do know some people like that in real life, and I plan to get there someday. Retain my warmth and spontaneity, yet be strong and dauntless in times of confusion, doubt and chaos.

As each day passes, I wonder with increasing frustration, why it is that the bad folks are popular and the good ones bitched about… Is the world so full of hypocrites that they hail each other and let the decent ones feel sidelined and criticized? I manage to see the good in every person, regardless of my personal appraisal of them. Why, then, do they not see me for who I am? If they do, why do they prefer to keep the distance? Is it better to be ignored than to be hated? I reckon. After all, they who bitch, bitch about everybody including their so called “friends”. Better off out of that evil circle, right?

Anyway… I’m also reading Karl, Aaj aur Kal by Cyrus Broacha. The creative comic that he is, Cyrus tires and disappoints me when he tries too hard. And that is what is happening with this book. It dint get too rave a review, but I wanted to read something that was light and celebrity-related. And honestly, Cyrus deserves to be read once. Once. Ahem, get the point, right?!

My latest hangouts in town – Terttulia, though it’s expensive and Subway, healthy and evergreen. I’ve recently discovered Café Leo which is a branch of the Leopold in Mumbai. It serves their USP, tower beer, which as the name suggests, is beer in a tower. It’s thrilling more than anything else, and pretty inexpensive as well. 6 mugs for 600, not bad, eh? And the range of delicious starters (you cant miss the Chilly Potato!) makes the trip totally worth it. The mocktails and cocktails are cool, too. Must visit!!

That’s all for now, buddies. Wish you a very happy Gudi Padwa and may all your “sensible” dreams come true in this new year…

Loads of love and luck to you and me!!

Cheerio!
Princess

When the going gets tough...

His first love.

Hers too.

To her, each time felt like the first time.

Cougar relations don’t survive, her friends told her.

Well, time would tell. It had kept mum for the last 3 years.

They were still madly in love. More than the day they’d got engaged, and less than what they knew they’d feel in a few years time…

Their love was a thriller like no other. Movies with the same theme had released and flopped in B-town, but living that life was an altogether different “story”.

Boy loved girl. Girl was dating another guy. This guy broke her heart and she wanted to keep away from commitments of any sort. Boy approached girl. They became friends, and she did not realise when she fell in love with him.

The mad kinda love that cannot be held back or manipulated.

Miya biwi raazi, but the families objected. Kya karega qaazi.

They spent days, months and years convincing their parents. Telling them about how crazy they were for each other, and how desolate and helpless without each other. The parents did not relent. Not even when they threatened to elope. “Run away,” they said, “coz we shall never agree to this match.”

Matches were made in heaven. But their realisation was subject to conditions that weren’t clearly specified anywhere. How else would you describe and explain the sad tales of Heer-Ranjha, Romeo-Juliet, and all those famous, ill-fated couples?

It wouldn’t happen to them, they decided. Society would mock them for a few days and then find other gossip to chuckle over. This was a matter of their life, and they owed it to themselves to choose what they thought was right. What happened later, they would deal with, themselves.

They ran away and got married, there was no other way. Life was not a bed of roses, but their love kept budding every day and blossoming every night. The scent of their bliss pervaded through every difficulty and carried them smiling through every struggle. Every minute was worth it, every success brought them closer.

Happy love stories are scarce, right?

Well, you shall be disappointed this time. Coz there was no shock waiting around the corner. Life continued to be merry, and what wasn’t so chilled out was made divine by their love and concern for each other.

Sometimes you gotta be brave. Sometimes you gotta go against the flow. Sometimes you gotta hurt those that worry for you and ignore when they guide you to do something.

Coz sometimes it’s not about what’s right or wrong. It’s about your heart.

A heart that is often wrong, but sometimes right.

If you ignore your heart then, you shall regret it forever.

And it’s easier to live with challenges than with regret. Coz a happily chosen test is way better than a forced compromise.

Be a fighter, listen to your heart.

If you stumble, get up and wipe off the grime.

Don’t shed a tear, don’t look back.

Be content with the fact that you chose the path for yourself.

You learnt something new, and you came out stronger.

Better a mistake than a regret.

Coz not everyone who wanders is aimless, and not everyone who quits is a loser…

Love, Luck, Laughter…
Princess

(Last line taken from the Hollywood flick “Mona Lisa Smile”)

Strong Spirits

A sigh escaped her lips.

Followed by a mumble…

“I’ve always been responsible, independently expected to take care of others as well as my own needs. I’ve never had a freedom to give everything up and just be…”

He turned to look at her.

She spoke on… oblivious to the fact that he was hanging on to her every word…

“Nobody realises that even I can feel weak, that even I can be helpless. They think I can do it all, fix everything, do all that is necessary…”

A tear trickled down her cheek.

“You have no idea how difficult it is… How I have to swallow my desperation, and show everyone the brave face that they think I possess no matter what the time or situation…”

Another tear, and then another…

“I have my feeble moments, too. And the worst thing is I can’t even admit it…”

He held her hand. The trickle gave way to a river. A river of tears that stung his own eyes.

“I can’t admit that I am weak and powerless. That even I am helpless. That there are times when even I, who has a solution for every goddamn thing in the universe, feel lost and miserable…”

She shuddered. He could see the effort it took her, how it drained her, and yet made her feel stronger by confessing. Words that she had never uttered in her life, and probably would never again.

“That there are times when I wish I could lie back and pretend to be frail and vulnerable, and wait for someone else to show me the way. Someone else would protect me and guide me without me having to use my brain, abilities and resources. Be to me, what I am to almost everyone around me. Feel the kind of security and reassurance due to someone else that people near me feel because they have me.”

He hugged her, his eyes moist.

“I’ll be there for you, baby. I’ll take care of you…”

She wept. The dam had broken.

He loved her. And he would never let her down.

The tears flowed on… With relief this time…

- Princess

Mirage

You live a lonesome, sorry life. You hate what is happening to you, and you know you cannot live this way forever. Yet, you bear it. Accept it. Suffer and continue to live on.

Mute. Patient. Forgiving.

Perfection personified.

Tolerance was your middle name.

You were waiting for the day to come when you would not be so sad and everything would be all right, if not great. You embraced all that fate swept in your way. Your life was just another story.

Until yesterday.

Today it has all changed.

You, from deep under the oceans, want to look up to the sky.

You, from under the deepest pits, want to raise your wings and fly away to the distant horizon sparkling red and silver.

The well and pond that you proudly called your world, now seems too destitute and inadequate.

Frustrating, you claim.

Your life is horrible, and you cannot live it anymore, you say today.

Oh what have I done to you!!

Have I shown you the way to be free and happy without knowing that it is nothing but an illusion for you? A distant dream that shall never be yours…??

Should I be glad that I made you see a new way to lead a better life, or shall I be guilty coz you will never be happy in your old life again?

- Princess

Navarasas

Why am I writing about this?

Well, one of my friends would answer that… “Coz I can”.
LOL :-D

But no, that’s not the only reason. I read about the navarasas in Amrita Nair’s book “Mistress”. The story is presented in chapters that talk about the different rasas in Kathakali (or even Bharatnatyam, for that matter). For the layman, what “rasa” means is an emotion that we experience and express facially and through gestures in these dance forms.

So, I got a little curious about the 9 rasas (just like I did in the 7 cardinal sins, 10 commandments, 7 wedding oaths, etc). And then, as usual, Wikipedia and some other websites satiated my hunger for information. Happy reading !!

Rasa is about human state of mind. It’s about what the mind feels and the expression of the feeling thereafter. In the Bharata’s Natyashastra, Rasa is an emotion experienced by the audience created by the facial expression or the Bhava of the actor. In Indian classical dance it is referred to as Rasa-abhinaya. Thus, every Rasa (mood) corresponds to a particular Bhava (expression).

Bharata Muni enunciated the eight Rasas (yes 8, not 9) in the Nātyasāstra, an ancient work of dramatic theory. Each rasa, according to Nātyasāstra, has a presiding deity and a specific colour. Let’s take a look!

Structure: Rasa – Bhava – Meaning – Colour - Presiding deity

Shringar – Rati – Delight, Love, Attractiveness - Light Green - Vishnu

Hasya – Hasa – Humor, Laughter – White - Pramata

Karuna – Shoka – Sorrow, Compassion, Mercy – Grey - Yama

Raudra – Krodh – Anger, Terrible – Red - Rudra

Veera – Utsaha – Heroism – Pale Orange/Yellowish - Indra

Bhayanaka – Bhaya – Fear, Horror – Black - Kala

Bibhatsa – Jugupsa – Disgust, Aversion – Blue - Shiva

Adbhuta – Vismaya – Wonder – Yellow – Brahma

The ninth rasa was added later:

Shanta – Calm – Peace – Blue - Vishnu

In addition to the above nine, two more appeared, especially in literature: Vatsalya (Parental Love) and Bhakti (Spiritual Devotion). However, the presiding deities, the colours and other details have not been specified.

Cool, eh?

I’ve not watched any Indian classical dance performance in a long time now. So, I don’t completely recall my experience. I must have been bored, though, coz I probably dint understand anything, and anyway, back then, it was cool to detest everything serious.

Now, I would like to go for some such show. Watch the unfolding of the plot, the revelation of the characters, their dedication, grace and expertise. Am I getting old? Well, technically yes. But its more about being mature than just age.

Count me in if you fit the bill…

Adieu!

Hasta La Vista.
Princess

Blessed... To Have U

This poem was chosen by Blogadda as a Tangy Tuesday pick !!!
Click here to go to their page - mine's post num 2 from the top :-)

Happy Valentine's Day, you'all...

I thought I was perfect,
Though my world was a jumble;
When I see the way you adore me,
Your love makes me feel humble.

Your eyes, they speak a million words,
The warmth they bestow upon me is divine;
Your gaze transports me to heaven,
You’re my guardian angel so fine.

Stand by me, your arms say,
As you clutch me in your embrace;
My fears and worries take flight,
I could stay that way for days.

Could I be so fortunate?
To have you to love and call my own;
You make me feel like a queen,
Your heart is my treasure, my throne.

It’s unbelievable, they way you’re there for me,
So incredible is your passion, fore-sightedness and care;
And then you say you’re fortunate to have me,
That your world without me is bare.

You’ve made me lose my inhibitions,
With you I feel so brave;
Within moments I have in my palm,
Anything that I recollect or crave.

It drives me insane, your need for me,
It places me on cloud nine;
I want to scream to the world,
You’re mine, all mine, all mine!

You seem to know me better than myself,
Your trust scares me, is it misplaced, I wonder?
Will you be happy and proud of us,
In times of hail, sunshine and thunder?

My thousand words fail, when you utter “I love you”,
All I want is to make you mine;
If I let you go away,
All my life I’ll regret and pine.

Knowing what I do, and believing what I see,
How can I ever deny?
That you’re my one and only,
Every hurdle and rule, for me, you’d defy.

To have someone that’s devoted,
Is a feat knotty and rare;
And yet, when I behold you,
My heart wishes to dream and dare.

They tell me this won't last,
They say love is a mirage, a deception;
I laugh at them all, and their blindness,
Coz what we have, you and I, is surely no illusion.

Come, my beloved, hold my hand,
And we’ll walk away from the world and its pain galore;
With you lies my future and destiny,
I could never ask for more...

Honoured to be,
Your truly

Lighten Up!!

For times when you’re feeling low…

When you don’t know what you’re doing in your job, and why the hell life isn’t working out for you…

Enjoy reading what’s below :-)

And keep the faith, hold on to your dream…

They will work out.

Superstar Rajnikanth did many jobs including that of a manual labourer before becoming a bus conductor, and later a succesfull actor.

Akshay Kumar used to worked as a chef and waiter at a restaurant in Bangkok before embarking on a Bollywood adventure.

Before he got the license to kill, Sean Connery worked as a milkman, bricklayer, lifeguard and coffin polisher. Now, can u believe it?

Gorden Sumner aka Sting worked as a bus conductor, construction labourer, tax officer and teacher before becoming a successful musician.

Marlon Brando was a high school drop out. He even worked as a ditch digger among many other jobs in his youth.

The once handsome Mickey Rourke had a face too good for a movie theater usher. Luckily, he got noticed.

Stallone's life was harder than Rocky Balboa's. He used to work as a lion cage cleaner at Central Park Zoo. After finding himself homeless, Stallone had to no other way but to act in a porn flick for a mere $ 200.

Pamela Anderson used to be a fitness instructor before. Her figure says it all!

Harrison Ford still enjoys carpentry. He was a self-taught carpenter whomade cabinets for George Lucas. It was his cabinet-making job that landed him a tiny role in Lucas' 'American Graffiti.' Rest is history.

Sandra Bullock used to worked as a bartender while in college.

Bon Jovi used to make Christmas decorations for a living.

In her teens, Megan Fox worked for a smoothie shop.

Queen Latifah used to work for Burger King, before getting expelled after losing her temper at work.

Nicolas Cage used to sell popcorn at the Fairfax Theater.

Brad Pitt used to work for El Pollo Loco restaurant on Sunset Boulevard often dressing up in a chicken costume.

Lady Gaga used to work as a waitress at a restaurant in NY.

Tom Cruise wanted to become a catholic priest and he even joined a Franciscan seminary! He would have become a hunky priest, but God had different plans!

Captain Jack Sparrow used to sell ballpoint pens in his early life.

Jennifer Aniston used to work as a bike messenger in New York City and Telemarketer before making it big in Hollywood.

Feeling better yet?!!

Muaaahh and god bless!
- Princess