The idiot box

I love watching TV.

I don’t get too much time to engage in this hobby as most of my day goes at work. The time I’m home, I’m either glued to my books or the phone or playing cards or bickering with family or other mundane stuff.

And of course, the times when I am dying to get my hands on the remote, and dad’s gazing at the dipping stocks and share prices on CNBC, or bro’s glaring at WWE or a movie, or mum’s viewing her stupid family soaps... (Bhabhi’s a relief that way...Till now at least! Touch wood)

Aaaannd how can I forget our picture tube’s screwed up, so half the time, we have to watch a single lightning bolt on the screen that refuses to give way to the actual reels. Feels like we’re back in the pre-TV era where transistor and radio were THE sources of entertainment and indicators of wealth and luxury. (Mum's found a way out though; she hits the TV's ass as hard as she can with anything she can lay her hands on - pillows, even a chappal the other day... had me in splits!)

So, in short, I watch the idiot box when I’m free and the TV’s in working order and the family’s got other things to do.

(Conjunction premises in Logic classes at undergrad sure drove me nuts, and now this is the new way they have managed to pervade into my life and haunt me further.)

Some of my favorite channels are Discovery Travel & Living, Cartoon Network, SAB, Pogo, Star World and Zoom (...in the order that they appear on our Akai at home).

And of course the Music Channels – MTV and Channel V. And the movie channels – Star Movies and HBO. (Which basically covers up the entire kitty of popular channels. I’m so impartial and lovable! I know...)

Discovery Travel & Living has long been one of my favorite channels for the simple reason that they know what the audience wants to watch. The title itself is outstanding, and the cherry(s) on top - the wonderful locales and brilliant themes. Be it Hell’s Kitchen or Cover Shot, Nigella’s feasts or Project Runway, Indian Rendezvous or Finest Hotels in the World. They also have some special series where they showcase unusual and must-visit beaches, casinos and other places (check out what I wrote about their show on toilets sometime last year). Kylie Kwong is one of my beloved characters and I adore her accent and quick, passionate movements while cooking. (No wonder that I watch her re-runs with ardor and diligence.)

Cartoon Network is fun when they are showing all those cute cartoon-y stuff. (I can’t seem to relate to the heavy-duty and hi-tech animation that they show in Pokemon and other action-packed programmes. I mean aren’t cartoons for kids? Aren’t kids the ones who are small and sweet and simple? Why convert them to tecno-gizmo-freaks in their tender years? But, whatever sells!) My fav shows are Tom & Jerry - the original, not the T & J kids version, and also Richie Rich and Popeye. I can sit back and relax and keep my brains in standby mode as I laugh out loud and get entertained by the familiar and endearing and adorable characters.

SAB – An Indian channel that stands for Sri Adhikari Brothers, the group that owns it. They are a laugh-a-thon and all day long you can see stories that are more or less similar and jokes that make an attempt to make you laugh. The wit and timing in most of their shows is admirable. Especially Yes Boss and Office Office. Taarak Mehta ka Oolta Chashmah (or something equally ridiculous) is a show that's fully faltoo, too!

Tadaa! Pogo time! A delight to watch courtesy :
1. Takeshi’s Castle - JJ’s rapchik commentary and Japanese nutty acrobatics leaves you guffawing.
2. Hole in the Wall - full timepass - good for displaying ur smartness and pearly-whites
3. Oswald - the cute, friendly octopus with a pet dog (and a daisy, tree, dragon and penguin for friends), and a trillion petty situations as major challenges that he solves as he sings his ridiculous, non-rhyming poems.
4. A host of children’s movies alongwith all those tales that we read as kids (Bheema, Ganesha, Akbar Birbal, and so on)
5. Rob’s creative show where he teaches and displays his art and craft

Star World needs no introduction. My picks? Friends, My Wife and Kids, Your Moment of Truth, the Ellen Degeneres show, America’s Got Talent, to name a few.

Why Zoom? For gossips and updates. For style and interviews. Reminds me of this crazy Rakhi Sawant show (where she in her seduced, make-husky voice) questions her celebrity guests and doesn’t let them answer...
MTV and Channel V are great for channel surfing purposes and to catch the latest movies and songs. Plus some very comical and witty fillers – like Bai, Lola Kutty, Fully Faltoo, Simi Girebaal's talk show, Style Check. Roadies, contests and Splitsvilla were popular shows a while ago. I hear a few of them are starting new seasons - Get Gorgeous and Roadies and Splitsvilla. (I wonder why so many youngsters are out to make fools of themselves so publicly!)

HBO and Star Movies show great movies every once in a while. Some of my other picks:

- Who Dares Wins on AXN (with a muscular, cute-smiled host and a sexy, heavy-busted hostess; as usual the theme was copied and a show made with Akki in the lead role minus the woman anchor.)
- Star One recently wrapped up its Sarabhai series, which tells an amusing tale of a family with a high-class couple and their low-class bahu and 2 sons, one adorable, the other plain stupid and irritating.
- CID on Sony, the detective series with the inimitable Shivaji Satam.
- Koffee With Karan - another talk show, but much more fun coz of the chemistry KJo shares with his celebrity guests

Sony, Zee, Star Plus have lost their sheen and charm. Besides them, there are a zillion channels in varied languages – Punjabi, Oriya, Bangla, Kannada, Gujarathi, and so on. For the news channels, Aaj Tak has all these sting operations that range from crap to utter crap; NDTV is more informative and sensible. And of course, to learn good English, my sincere recommendation to all my students at inlingua was to watch English news channels like the BBC. (The articulation and intonation is WOW. I still learn from them and swoon in amazement...)

Quite a documentary, this! It's TV time, folks!

C ya later...
Anuja