Saturday, March 14

Alco-Horoscopes (contd...)

Heyloooo!

Ready for the remaining list?

What your sunsigns say about YOUR EXPECTED BEHAVIOUR AFTER YOU GET DRUNK!!

LIBRA
"I'aam jushtt a shocial drinkerrr," slurs Libra, "it's jusht that I'aam so damn shocial." Libra loves nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone. Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Frienddevice set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side (they are little instigators when bored), the Scales can really work a room. Charming as they are, Libras are notoriously lacking in self-control, however, which can get them into all sorts of trouble -including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the evening, flirting with every man/woman in the room or even blacking out the night's events entirely. Oops!

SCORPIO
Don't ever tell Scorpios they've had enough, for they'll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till they're hog-whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to drink, and screw you if you have a problem with that. Most of them seethe sauce as something to savor in itself, and not as a personality-altering tool - though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration. But generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists and dizzying flirts. They also remember everything - especially what you did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio who likes you.

SAGITTARIUS
Saggi’s when buttered, will spill all your secrets and many of their own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This is a sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the sign of Sinatra, Keith Richards, and Anna Nicole Smith?) They're the people who chat up everyone in the room, then persuade the entire crowd to travel somewhere else - like a nightclub, or a playground, or Cancun. Good-natured hijinks are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call).

CAPRICORN
Capricorn is usually described as practical, steadfast, money-hungry and status-thirsty. No wonder they get left off the astrological cocktail-party list. But this is the sign of David Bowie and Annie Lennox, not to mention Elvis. Capricorn is the true rock star : independent, powerful and seriously charismatic, not too eager to please. And if they make money being themselves, who're you to quibble? But just like most rock stars, they're either totally on or totally off, and they generally need a little social lubricant to loosen up and enjoy the after party, especially if they can hookup with a cute groupie.

AQUARIUS
Aquarius and drinking don't go together that well (except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward know-it-all-ism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn than a stain on stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an outing, however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative - and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately, they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best designated drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist). Aquarius is fascinated by drunk people and capable of holding interesting conversations with soused strangers while sober.

PISCES
If you're a Pisces, you've probably already heard that you share a sign and an addictive personality - with Liz Taylor and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in the dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they build up a mighty tolerance fast. Who needs an expensive date like that? On the other hand, they're fabulously enchanting partners, whether in conversation or in crime. With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and windup in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive personality" can be read two ways, you know.

So, how true is this, folks?!! Leme know...

Cheers!
Princess

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