Monday, October 6

Mad(e) for each oder...

Further to our previous tête-à-tête on Marital Bliss (Shaadi Ka Ladoo), I hav been thinking how to add to dat 20-something list widout seemin too snobbish and demandin (!) And here are a few more pointers... Which I’m sure you’ll nod with...

Possibly the most crucial requirement in wedlock (and the most difficult, at times) is faith. You want your partner to believ u at all times (provided u hav a reputation in truthfulness), and you want him/her to support you in all your senseless and bright ideas/actions. Itna bharosa, itni pehchan, ki even wid eyes blindfolded, ur partner can guess and predict ur current and future behavior. Couples wid this kinda understandin invariably join the ranks of the happy and contented. Aah, its sooooo relievin and exhilarating to hav sum1 trust u so much!

Further to dat, u want your spouse to stand by u (even when u wrong), to pose as ur shield when the entire world’s against u (which more often dan not, is ur own family). Each one desires someone who treats ur respect as his/her own, and would not bear to c u belittled in anyway in public (Tho he’ll yell and brag about it till he hits d grave!) I kno the "do jism, ek jaan" statement sounds too dramatic and filmi, but its true! No1 can survive alone and fight all his/her fights alone... At the end of the day (and even during it), you need someone to rest your tired (and empty) head on... and jus release a HUGE sighhh.... Hushhhhh... (Not the Ramdeo Baba one, people. His pranayam therapy gives me the jitters!)

A life-mate who can make up for ur shortcomings, and manage your weaknesses with empathy and care, one who does not target your weak points and painful nerves (what’s the English version of dukhti rugh?), someone who may not share your likes, but lets u talk on and on (and on!) about your fav topics (and the jackpot is if he/she REALLY listens!)...

A spouse who knows when enuf is too much (wrt teasing) or too less (wrt ice-cream), someone who knows when sumthin’s hurtin, and doesn’t force u to either cry or laugh it off... jus lets u b, widout any pretensions or facades...

A lifelong friend who knows fights cant b avoided forever, yet does not put in dat extra effort to incorporate such exchanges in daily life. One who dsnt fight to WIN, but to resolve issues - clearly, the target is issues and behaviors, not opportunities for character assassination and accusations and complaints (dat usually start wid “you always” and “you never”)... A sane individual who recognizes dat putting off conflict-resolution and sleeping over an argument can only multiply and boomerang a hundred-fold...

And leme not forget, a couple who can laugh wid eachoder, and AT eachoder... As also a couple who can cry wid eachoder, and FOR eachoder...

Huhhh... Amazin how the words flow when one’s feelin committed and animated! I’m not sure whether these qualities flow as lucidly in the lives of wedded pairs, but these sure are some steps dat each one of us (married or not) can take to nurture better relationships. It’s tough (whoever said life was easy?!!) but then wats life widout a challenge, and wats a challenge widout someone to hold your hand?!

Find that someone, and if you already have, cherish him/her...
The lonely know how much they fret in solitude while putting on a phony “Singles Rock!” grin in fronta others...

I’m there...
Always...
All ways...

Lonely Princess