Breaking News

Pune: For the last several months, a virus is known to infest the life of a loving-grandma-in-the-head-and-kid-at-heart writer and trainer in the city. This virus has now been identified by eminent scientists and researchers as Love and Companionship Deficiency Syndrome (LCDS).

Symptoms of this deadly virus include:
Wanting to feel loved, secure and relaxed all the time
Staring morosely at nothing for hours on end
Becoming extremely philosophical or detached
Desiring to be pampered and taken care of
Weeping at the drop of a hat (or a pin, whatever’s easily available)
Humming slow, sentimental songs
Wishing to be held close and patted to sleep
Yearning for unconditional trust, love and companionship

These individuals may appear busy and social, but scratch the outer layer and you will see how intensely they require the intimacy that surrounds the “blessed ones” like a warm protective envelope.

Our reporter met one such person and he (name withheld to protect identity) stated “I feel like a puppy who runs to the person who shows the teeniest bit of affection… Even if that very individual was kicking it a moment ago… I feel helpless and unwanted, even frustrated with my overpowering need to be loved deeply and consistently by someone.”

Another young professional quips, “I am waiting for someone who will do the craziest and simplest things to make me smile, someone who is head over heels for me. Of course, I won’t ask him to jump off Mount Everest, but he should be caring enough to go that extra mile to make me happy and never make me sad.”

The Save-our-LCDSians club seconds this appeal. They claim that members don’t want a Prince/Princess Charming, just a dedicated lover and an intimate friend who understands them. “If that is too much to expect,” says the President, “we can even settle for one who doesn’t misunderstand!”

“Our effort is to bring together caring and affectionate people who bears the LCDSian patiently and lovingly however unreasonable or cranky the infected person might become. After all, when the patient is in a better mood, he/she makes up a hundred-fold for all that’s done for him/her” adds the President.

Any questions or contributions to this noble club maybe addressed to:
1, Vulnerable Villa
Lonely Lane,
District Depressed
100 001