Johny Don’t Lie No More

OK so I bet you’ve heard the song Hips Don’t Lie by Shakira, and also the nursery rhyme we learnt in kindergarten. The one that goes “Johny Johny. Yes Papa. Eating Sugar. No Papa.” Right… that one…

Wanna know one of my all-time favorite jokes that nobody but I crack up on?

Well, you got no choice. I’m obviously telling you.

So (tee hee hee) there’s this elephant that kills the zebra (ha ha) and the giraffe is investigating the matter. A hippopotamus is witness to the murder (LOL), and the elephant pleads him not to reveal the facts. When the giraffe goes up to the hippo, the hippo calmly discloses (smirk smirk) all there is to say. The elephant goes all snotty and sad and confronts the hippo.

Elephant to Hippo : “So, dude, why did you not protect me? You could have covered my a**.”

Hippo to Elephant: “My dear friend… You know what they say… Hips don’t lie.” (ROFL)

Ok… ridicule me all you like. I still love this joke. So what if no one but me laughs?!!

Right. Getting back to the point. I’ve not written this post to tell you jokes and poems. It’s to share with you one of my greatest learnings, whatever little I’ve managed to grasp in my twenty years (and five).

DON’T TELL LIES.

Bet your parents and teachers drilled it into you when you were young. Their intention was to make you a good, honest human being.

My intention is the same too (god bless your merry soul), but the motivation is entirely different - You’ll goof up and be trapped if you lie. So better tell the truth than be caught with your pants down.

It’s like this, you gotta remember all the details if you ever hide something. And trust me it’s too much of a bother. You can afford to forget trivialities when you’re on the right side of the line. Not when something sudden comes up a year or two later (or even a month or week later) and you can’t recall what you’d said when you’d shared the facts originally.

No way am I preaching, nor am I saying that I’ve been as truthful and scrupulous as the great Harishchandra all my life. There have been many times when I told white, grey and black lies… And though I wasn’t caught each time (thank heavens for that), I certainly didn’t enjoy the few times I was.

Like when I told mum I was going to Mumbai for my friend’s brother’s wedding, and instead went for a modeling show. Or when I met a friend without informing another friend. Gosh. Extremely embarrassing moments. Especially for someone like me who always wants to show how honorable and faultless I am.

However, I admit it, and I apologize for all the worry and hurt I’ve caused. Trust me, it wasn’t worth it. Telling the truth would have led to a spat, but it’s better than to blunder by lying.

Now let’s look at the other side of the coin. Why do we lie? Coz someone does give us the confidence, freedom or opportunity to tell the truth. Someone’s reactions to the outcome of our actions may forbid us from sharing the reality with that person.

I knew my mum would not approve of my going for a show to Mumbai. She was dead against my modeling in the first place, and for me to be walking the ramp wearing costumes magnificent and modern, no way was she going to be happy. And I wanted to go. Had not going been an option, I would have discussed it with her, and accordingly made a decision. But nope, I HAD to go, and there was no way I could do that without offending or worrying momma. Bingo! Lie in place. Caught a few weeks later. Sorry, Maa… Didn’t mean it that way, you know that… Sorry, and love you.

And… hiding the truth is as good as telling a lie… No arguments.

I won’t go as far as to say that I admire all honest folks, that’s not my only criterion to like or dislike a person. However, I do find it extremely brave when people accept their mistake or oversight. In the corporate world, the blame game is very popular. So, when an individual comes out in the open and admits an error, it’s worth appreciating.

Talking about admiration, I’m mad about the creative team at Vodafone. What a brain these guys got! First it was Pug, then ZooZoo and now the Blackberry Boys jingle. Proves that you don’t always need an Amitabh or Shahrukh or Akshay or Aamir to sell a product. Sometimes, good melodies and great ideas can do the trick. Hats off to you guys, if you’re reading this! Good job.

Waise, Vodafone comes across as quite an exciting employer. My bhabhi worked there for a year, and it was superb to hear her telling us about the various events they hosted and the wonderful goodies they gave out every now and then. Talk about keeping internal customers happy, and Vodafone would come out tops. Innovative way to brand your products and market value. Cheers again!

Who else do I admire? Rajnikanth! Hahaha… It’s true. That guy rocks! At his age, to have a fan following that tremendous and passionate – not a feat anyone and everyone can manage! I was eager to see Robot, but didn’t find the time or company! Definitely gona catch it when I can...

On that note , I’m gona share some amazing Rajnikant jokes… Yenjoyyy!!

Rajnikant has counted to infinity-twice.
When Rajnikant does pushups, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the earth down.
The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajnikant kicked one of the corners off.

Ain’t that super cool? But there’s one more “R” I heartily adore…

Rosech / Rosesh Sarabhai! I miss that serial. Wonder why they don’t come up with a new season… Wana read some of his poems? Here you go!!

Title: Momaa ka purse

Momaa ka purse jaise hospital ki pyaari si koi nurse
Purse mein rakha tissue paper karta hai paseene ka ilaaj
Aur lipstick ho jaise bhookhe honton ka anaaj
Momaa ke purse ka hai makhmali sa sparsh
Momaa ka purse
Momaa ka purse.

Another one…
Khatar khun khatar khun khatar khun
Sun mere dil ki dhun
Tere pyaar ki oiling mil gayi isey
Toh khatar khun ka ho jaayega gun gun "

Come back next time for some more killers by Rajni and Rosesh!

And feel free to share Rosesh and Rajnikanth's awesomeness on the blog, You can comment by clicking the link below that says comments...

And I’m not lying :-)

Cheerio!
Princess