I wander the world in a bid to escape the mundane,
But I’m always glad to return home and see who missed me,
Who smiles the widest,
And tells me I would never be allowed to take off again.
I tell you I don’t want to see you,
That my life would be much more uncomplicated and agreeable without you,
And all the while my heart is beseeching you to hold me,
And tell me you’ll never leave me.
I show that I don’t care,
I pretend to not mind things and portray myself a cool cat,
And I’m burning inside, wondering why they can’t see through my façade,
Despite knowing me.
I often have the last laugh,
I am a winner, and my perfection is admired and envied by most,
Yet there are occasions when I wish my acumen wasn’t repeatedly proven,
To see your amazed, proud face.
I love and care with all I’ve got,
I can make you feel blessed and lucky,
But I hope you to realize it’s not your prerogative,
It’s something I’m honoring you with, because I love you, deeply.
I shout when I want to cry,
I laugh when I want to scream,
I know when I’m not being treated right,
And if you think I can go on without objecting, aren’t you mistaken…
I’ll lie if it makes you happy,
But they’ll know the truth sooner or later,
Not coz I’m a bad liar,
But coz I’ll ensure my true opinions and feelings are known someday.
I know I behave odd at times,
I know I can be frustrating and crabby,
But tell me if it’s really that bad,
Coz if it is, then maybe my love isn’t good enough either.
You can’t want the convenience,
If my wants are so bothersome,
I’m the best one can ever have,
Too bad if you don’t know that, too bad if you’re waiting and expecting better.
I started off writing this as a love note,
To show how confused and duplicitous I can be,
But the moment my vulnerability was expressed, my ego came forth,
To protect my weakness, to stand guard over myself,
To show that no matter who comes forth to **** around, you’ll be vanquished.
No, you can’t win by defeating me, but we can win together.
We WILL win together.