Koi Mil Gaya

I am in love.

I want to spend my entire life with him.
Maybe get married to him.

Him and nobody else.

I don’t want to make compromises.
I know I deserve the best.
He IS the best.

Edward.

A vampire.

The heroic monster in Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight series.

Did I scare you?
Well, can’t say I’m kidding.

Why would I?

He’s cute and handsome.
He never gets angry with her, whatever her action or emotion.
He is extremely romantic, I get goosebumps even as I imagine his actions...
He is so caring, it makes me cry with love and pleasure.
He is ALWAYS there for her.
He can be possessive and short-tempered, but he is very sensible and trusting.
He loves his partner like crazy and doesn’t even LOOK at other females, be they pretty or sexy.
He gives you those lovely jitters the way he loves and speaks and looks at Bella.
He’ understanding and patient.
He is polite in the most challenging situations and he’s always brave in times of crisis.
He is well-behaved, witty and jolly.
He pampers his lover and makes her feel complete.
He can do everything perfectly – kissing, driving, studying…
Even in the worst of situations and tempers, he is always civil to people, so what if they're enemies?
He spends all his time with his partner.
He can be impulsive but he is strong and protective.
He can stand being hurt if his partner is safe, comfy and happy.
His possessiveness is irritating yet adorable, yet he is controlled and reasonable.
He knows his lover inside out, and is very NICE.
He is SO wantable.
He makes me feel awesome even as I read about the things he does and says to Bella!!
He is ready to do anything for his lover. And THAT is a HELLUVA LOT!
He made a mistake once and for that he is forever guilty and apologetic, trying to make amends...

Why wouldn’t I want to be with him?

Tell me ONE good reason.

I’d lose my soul?

Who cares…

I’d trade my everything for love any day…



Sincerely,
Princess

The Divine Crossing

As much as I love talking about myself, people, relationships, movies, TV shows (and a host of other topics), I can't deny that a good blog, an interesting blog deals with a wider variety of subjects and themes. Of course, there are people who argue that one blog should have one single theme.

Whatever... I've written too much about love and heartbreak in the past 2 weeks, and I'm feeling guilty about not giving you guys more chow to chew on...

So, this time round, I'm gona write one of my favorite bhajans :-)

Yeah, you heard right. I love devotional songs, especially when my mum sings them melodiously and sincerely... And I sing them myself, too. Not as well, for sure, but certainly with dedication.

This one particular bhajan was originally sung by the adorable Anup Jalota. It's called "Jaana Tha Ganga Paar". It tells a story in the Ramayana, when Shri Ram, Seeta and Lakshman reach the Ganges and want to cross it with the assistance of the boatman Kevat.

Let me jot down the lyrics first, and you can always check out the tune online (unless you want to set your own rhythm.) It goes like this...

कभी कभी भगवान को भी भक्तो से काम पडे,
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे,
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे। (That's the chorus)

अवध छोड़ प्रभु वन को जायें,
सीया राम लखन गंगा तट आये,
केवट मन ही मन हर्शाये,
घर बैठे प्रभु दर्शन पाए,
हाथ जोड़ कर प्रभु के आगे केवट मगन खड़े,
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।

प्रभु बोले तुम नाव चलाओ,
पार हमे केवट पहुचाओ,
केवट कहता सुनो हमारी चरण धुल की माया भारी,
मैं गरीब नैय्या मेरी नारी ना होई पडे,
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।

केवट दौड़ के जल भर लाया,
चरण धोये चरणामृत पाया,
वेद ग्रंथ जिन के यश गाये केवट उनको नाव चढाये,
बरसे फूल गगन से ऐसे भक्त के भाग बड़े,
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।

चली नाव गंगा की धारा,
सीया राम लखन को पार उतारा,
प्रभु देने लगे नाव उतराई केवट कहे नही रघुराई,
पार किया मैंने तुमको,
पार किया मैंने तुमको,
अब तू मोहे पार करे,
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।
जाना था गंगा पार प्रभू केवट की नाव चदे।

Lovely, eh? I get goose-bumps as I hear or sing the final line - the "ab tu mohe paar kare" one... You should listen to this once, I promise you won't regret it...

Shall tell you the story next time in case you not well-versed in Hindi or mythology :-)

Take care!
Princess

Uff Ye Utopia

Sadiyon se kitni tanha rahi hun... Ishq tera bhool gayi hun...

At times, Bridget Jones ceases to be a fictional character.

I often meet women who seem a perfect twin of this character created by Helen Fielding.

Sometimes I think it’s me.

Being a spinster at 25 is a dilemma. You don’t know whether to rejoice coz you’re enjoying your freedom and boosting your career and hanging out with friends with no restrictions and blah and blah. Or to be sad coz you aren’t married like the rest of your troop and producing babies as you cook for your husband and experience other fringe benefits of conjugal life.

I mean I had this friend in college who got married in the last year of graduation and came to give her final exam with sindoor in her hair and a mangalsutra on her neck. As she keeps uploading snaps of her baby (now about 2 years old), I can’t help feeling awkward when I realize she is my age. For that matter, even my sister-in-law is barely a year older to me, and she was married 2.5 years ago.

As my peers and juniors keep announcing their marital plans on Orkut and Facebook, I raise a toast for them and wonder when and how I will join the bandwagon. Not that I’m dying to get married. I’m just eager to begin a new life, with a soul-mate who understands me and is always there for me. And yeah, my own room to stay in… Sick of sharing my room with others…

(Not that I’ll shoo my husband out, but at least it’ll have more privacy than what I have to endure at the moment.)

Of course, I know wedded life has its own troubles. Yet, at the end of the day, you know that whoever you are fighting or celebrating with, is yours truly and shall remain so forever. Breaking up after marriage is never an option, as far as my views are concerned. This reliability is what is so attractive after marriage. Of course, it seems like shackles at odd times. Nothing’s perfect! But I think I'm ready to take the chance. And I know I shall make a wonderful life partner, a little cranky but very lovable and caring.

It's funny how my generation believes more in arranged marriages than love marriages. I mean this was the normal attitude in the 60s and 80s, but given the modernization and westernization, one would believe that love marriage would be here to stay. I guess the increasing number of failed love marriages is proving to people that life is not as lovey-dovey after the wedding as it was during the dating days. Sad, but true.

I myself have undergone a transition from the very first time I thought about marital bliss and said "arranged", then changed my views in college, and finally now I'm back on the "family knows best" bandwagon. I've realised that the men I meet are not as dependable and sweet as they seem in the first few meets, and hence, this change in perspective. At least with the family involved, one can be assured of the past and the future. The responsibility is not the couple's alone!

I'm feeling terribly empty inside, I don't know why... I checked out this site called www.netdoctor.co.uk and there are a lot of issues that are discussed here in a very sensible yet empathetic way, Check it out if anything's bothering you :-)

Or you can always turn to me.

Forever,
Lonely Princess

P.S. Hey! I have not just aced the Psychology department at the Pune University, I've actually topped the entire M.A. exam!! Now how cool is that!! And another news is that Kellogg has waived my interview, which means my application has moved on to the next round. Cheerio! IF I GET ADMITTED TO KELLOGG... Man, life ban jayegi! Shall keep u updated! :-D

Men's Rules

Hiya!

Did you know that today is celebrated as International Men's Day?!!
Best wishes gentle (and not so gentle) men!!

This post comes out to all you poor males who are sick of handling your women and bugged of their zillion complaints.

(Hardly an exception, is there?!!)

I agree, ladies are just TOO complicated!!

(Though I gave you some fine tips in The Secret. Hope you've used and benefitted from them.)

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. How men always do the wrong things, and fail to fulfil basic expectations...

Now here are the rules from the male side. A forward that I recently received (from an unknown man, who I requested to remove me from his forwards mailing list; but I'm glad he sent me this one!!)

These are the rules...
All numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! ;-)

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
JUST SAY IT!

1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Any illness that lasts 17 months is serious; go see a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, Really.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Tee hee hee... Rib-tickling and side-splitting...
That's the way men are, and we love them for it, now dont we girls??!!!

(Okay, we don't... However, lets just say it this once... It's their day, ladies!! We'll give them hell for this starting tomorrow. Fine?!!)

Love,
Princess

Snob-itis

A new disease that deserves a mention in the medical and personality nomenclature...

Hitting the youth with increased vigor.

The deadly, the ugly... SNOB-ITIS.

I hate snobs. What do they think of themselves? That they’re one in a million? Of course they are. Just like everybody else… Or one in 1.15 billion, to be more precise (that’s 1,150,000,000… fantastic, eh?)

My office has more than its fair share of snobs. People throw attitude as if they were born monarchs and happen to be here just because of some cruel joke that destiny played on them. Crazy folks strutting around glancing at others out of the corner of their eyes with a silly, insulting smirk on their ugly lips… What’s to be gained by looking down on everybody around?

I seriously don’t understand. I myself am pretty outgoing (though I don’t talk half as much as most people I know) and I make sure I talk to anybody and everybody, regardless of age, gender, caste or whatever. I think it my duty to be nice to new joinees or those who are uncomfortable in a new situation. Snooty people think it lowly when they approach someone and so they stay aloof, projecting an ice-queen/king image, waiting for others to get friendly. And then there are some who dislike it even when someone makes an attempt to strike a conversation. As long as one’s safety and dignity is not jeopardized, what’s the harm in being courteous??? Height of haughtiness.

Maybe it’s the upbringing. Maybe the personality. The ancient nature-nurture controversy. Whatever, I really hate it...

In fact, I’ve often felt that belonging to a group of guys is a wonderful thing. Most males are cool, unbothered and affable. They invite and adjust with anybody, and one can become a part of the group without doing/proving too much. Women crib a lot about being “similar” and having “matching wavelengths”. And I say it’s irritating. Yes, I do show attitude at times, when I really don’t want someone to approach me, but I ensure that I openly state my feelings most of the times. I hate dragging things and creating issues. My being upfront occasionally lands me in a soup, but I don’t regret it. I’d rather not let things cook in my and others’ minds.

Back to gender benders. Guys DO gossip (no use your squealing and vehemently denying this), but it’s the sharing-fun-incidents kinds, not the who’s-dating-whom so typical of girls. And no “Aah”, “Ooohh” and “Omigosh” that women frequently use with reference to make-up, dressing trends, and this-freaky-guy-asked-me-out-the-other-day stories. With men, it’s easy and effortless. They laugh, they chill out. No wonder most of my good friends are guys. Of course, their maturity and sensitivity level isn’t exactly as splendid as females, but no one’s perfect!

Check out this quote I found in the midst of my silly googling sessions…
“…I like snobs. A snob has to spend so much time being a snob that he has little time left to meddle with you” – William Faulkner
“The true snob never rests; there is always a higher goal to attain, and there are, by the same token, always more and more people to look down upon” - J. Russell Lynes

Catch ya later!

Be GOOD!
-Princess

Happy Children's Day!!

And Happy B'day Chacha Nehru :-)

A cat crosses my path every day.

(Just remembered a stupid joke I received the other day – what does it mean when a cat crosses your path when you are going somewhere?....

… It means the cat is also going somewhere.

Tee hee hee. Very funny. Thanks for nothing, Ameya.)

Well, I’m not superstitious really. But you know how it is. Such things tend to stay with you and you think of them even if you actually don’t believe in them. Which is why each time I see a cat that crosses my path, my heart gives a lurch. And I ponder for a second, will it be me who crosses that crossed line first? Shall I wait till somebody else passes?

Of course, now that it happens daily without fail, and obviously something bad does not happen to me every single day (now that would be so horrendous and unfair!), I hardly spare a thought. Yet, it’s irritating. Say, a guy crashed his bike on a pillar last week as I was riding to work. Maybe the cat DIDN’T cross his path…

There are these other superstitions. Like when you leave the house, don’t utter the word “chappal” or “water”. Or when you sneeze, don’ leave the house immediately. Or if you see an empty bucket/pail while going somewhere, it means your purpose is futile. Really psyches me out. Wish I didn’t know these things at all, coz now that I am aware of them, I can’t help but recognize them and say an extra prayer. Just in case.

Anyways, I ain’t writing this post to discuss superstitions and silly traditions. I was just thinking, how time has flown! It seems like a few months that 2009 began, and lo! It’s almost over. It is as if someone’s put the clock on fast forward. And boy, whatever was happening in the city over the past week? It was pouring like crazy and it was so windy I was afraid I'd get blown away with my Scooty! Courtesy a cyclone (Phyan) alert in the Arabian Sea and adjoining areas i.e. Mumbai, Pune, and other places. Even otherwse, Pune's getting quite chilly, and it as pleasant. But, I hate it when people all around me (including myself) keep falling sick due to the weather.

It’s been three and a half months since I joined Yellow Box. At the moment, I am doing three different levels, one for absolute beginners, one for intermediate and the other for advanced. Know which one I’m enjoying the most? The first one, where there are 4 students, all in the age group of 20-25 years, and they didn’t even know how to write A-Z correctly! After teaching them the alphabet, I did some vocabulary with them, and boy, I’ve realized I can be TREMENDOUSLY patient when I want!! Yet, this resolve fails when I see insincere or casual attitude. Two smart Alecs who really test my tolerance end up being verbally bashed by me almost every single day. I ain’t perfect! But I try when I see the other person trying… Taali do haath se bajti hai mere dost!

Been going crazy these last few days trying to locate someone with a Mastercard or American Express. The University of Texas at Austin accepts only these two cards for fee payment, and everyone I know has a Visa. Only recently managed to get the payment done. Didn't get an accept from Cambridge UK :-( Now anxiously awaiting a buzz from the other univs where I have applied. Touch wood!

Watched Jail last evening with the family. I'm amazed to say that the film was not as violent or bad as I'd imagined. Looks like my keeping my expectations down has really helped me enjoy my movie experience! Neil Nitin Mukesh, unfortunately, has proved yet again that he can't act; his dialogue delivery is especially horrendous. But, his expressions are pretty heartrending. Mugdha Godse looks pretty but has very little to do. Ditto the marvelous Atul Kulkarni and the fantastic Manoj Bajpayi. The movie, like other Madhur Bhandarkar creations is very real and conceiveable. Especially when you see the unfair, inhumane and hopeless legal system in India as well as the poor conditions of our jails and prisons.

I had read about this in Shantaram, so it was a deja-vu for me. However, I still shed a few tears like when Neil finally gets released, and a few times before that, when he gets frustrated and suffers for it. Indeed, the human heart hardens when dealing regularly with corpses and criminals, innocence dies and the animal in us comes to life. Happy ending in the movie (that too, after 2+ years of undeserved punishment). Happy endings in real life? Doubtful. Movie very watchable. Go for it.

Re-reading Bridget Jones Diary and That Thing Called Love simultaneously to kill time before I sleep. Need to go book shopping sooooooooon...

Ciao.
Princess

No Demand, No Complaint

I’ve found the mantra for a peaceful and cheerful life – no demands, no complaints.

Guess where I stumbled upon this wisdom? In Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani.

I sincerely think I should stop getting excited about Bollywood movies and expecting too much from them. I manage to get disappointed when people around me find the movie “good”, “nice”, even “wonderful”.

I mean anybody would think that the brilliant Rajkumar Santoshi, with movies like Andaz Apna Apna, Damini, Ghayal, Ghatak and China Gate behind him, would come up with something extraordinary. What he’s whipped up this time falls short of spectacular by just about a 100 light years.

The music certainly is good; I’ve been humming “prem ki naiya hai Raam ke bharose, apni bhi naiya ko paar tu laga de” and “tera hona lage hoon, jab se mila hoon” all day… But, is that enough? The plot is really stale and it is only the beautiful Katz and adorable Ranz (whatever) that make the movie watch-worthy.

Interested in the story anyway? OK. Ranbir is a happy-go-lucky chap, an uneducated fellow who believes in enjoying life and making others smile. He meets Katrina and instantly falls in love with her. He tries to patao her, but she mistakes this as pure friendship and mentally romances her high-class boyfriend Upen Patel (as dim-witted as usual). Obviously, the brainless brawny hunk cannot marry her without causing trouble as his dad is a politician and fears losing Hindu votes if he welcomes a Christian bride. Our hero selflessly plays matchmaker and tries to unite the loving couple. All to no avail, coz Katz realizes (finally) how much the seedha-sadha Ranbir loves her. And then it’s living happily ever after.

The climax is typical Andaz Apna Apna style, where the audience is tickled by the crazy antics of a don and the different characters that make up the plot. That don’t impress me much, and I am giving this movie a 6 on 10. Not a must watch, good for a dekko on the lappie.

No wonder, I’m eagerly awaiting (and crossing my fingers) for 2012 and New Moon that are releasing next week. And of course, 3 Idiots by the inimitable Amir Khan. Hits screens December 25.

Oh by the way, India has lost the series, a very pitiable and disgusting defeat if I may add... Kudos to the Australian team! How I wish racism hadn't marred the country's image...

Well, we're racist in India as well, and what's worse towards our own countrymen! The MNS hooligans created ruckus when an MLA took his oath in Hindi. Isn't that supposed to be our national language?!! Sickly, stupid people...

Catch ya later!
Princess

Too (Bad) Timing

I can’t see my mother cry.
One, coz my eyes are full of tears.
Two, coz she’s an adorable sweetheart and the people who trouble her are jerks.

It’s ludicrous how people don’t realize and appreciate that others are going out of their way to do something for them. They believe it is their right, their privilege. They think they’re entitled to being treated well. And it’s SO infuriating!! Seriously man, such people need to be taught how to be thankful and gracious.

I feel very bad for mum. I wonder what she’ll do when she has nobody to stand up for her when I get married and move away. In the last 10 years, she sure has outgrown her timid nature, but she still acts like a helpless baby when times are tough. And I end up protecting her. No wonder I’m so blunt and fair all the time. My reputation reeks!

As if I care…

People who know me understand me and my actions. Without explanation and justification.

The rest won’t get it anyway. So why bother?!

(As if I haven't said that before...)

Anyways… I’m done with Eclipse. (350 pages in less than a week's time, not bad eh?) Quite a novella, this. I got a little bored with the ancient sagas about vampires and werewolves, but obviously they were crucial to the storyline. What really triggered my sentiments was the crazy love triangle between Edward-Bella-Jacob, further complicated by the fact that Isabella loves both, the vampire as well as the werewolf. And of course, both of them are adorable and worthy, that the reader can’t help but feel sorry for the one who Bella rescinds.

Poor Jacob Black.

Poor, poor Jacob Black.

The final epilogue describes his reaction and feelings when Bella plans to marry darling Eddie and become a vampire, bidding goodbye to her human life.

I identified with the story too easily for my own liking. I know how it is to love two people at the same time. Not in the same capacity, to the same degree, but similar nevertheless. And having to choose, is as bad as having to decide between losing your hand versus losing your leg. You need both, don’t you?

Well, I do…

Yet sometimes you really can’t have both. And you end up hurting one individual who means the world to you. The one you hurt more is yourself. Coz no matter what/who you choose, you feel sad, guilty and defeated.

However, now I've understood that one is better off opting for the option that is sensible, even if it may not be the most exciting.

Life isn’t rocking all the time, na?

Well, the timing for one thing is perfect - that's the release of Ajab Prem Ki Gazab Kahani. The movie hits theatres today, and I am very eager to see it. Katrina and Ranbir make a very attractive couple, and I'm sure fireworks will fly...

And hey, there's another piece of good news - I've won 3 prizes at the Pune University M.A. level for scoring the highest marks in Psychology. It's not much, about 750 Rupees, but what matters more to me is the (non-existent) certificate. I'd been waiting for this (without hope, actually, coz I was told there's no such recognition) and here it finally comes. Der aaye durust aaye... Will have to preserve the letters as proof. Cheers anyway!

Oooohhh... and Roadies is beginning this Sunday 7 pm... Wild Africa is the location. Sighhhh... Rannvijay man!!!

Love,
Lonely Princess

Yours Un-Emotionally

Nanak aaya, Guru Nanak aaya...

I used to go to the gurudwara every year on this day... Haven't done that in the last 2 years; had a split with a Sikh friend...

Anyway, wish you all a belated Happy Guru Nanak Jayanti...

Cheers, buddies! Mum's back! Yippeeeeee... And double cheers coz India lost the match yesterday. I knew Australia would kill it. Not that I ain't patriotic, it's just that I don't have much faith in our Indian cricket team. Don't blame me : half the people I know agree with my viewpoint.

Awrite time out. Don't be wild at me just coz we may not think alike.

So, I told you about this essay I had to do for NYU Stern. Not an essay exactly; anything to describe yourself creatively. I can’t believe how many people this essay has made me hostile towards…

I mean, seriously!

Now, I’m not the absolutely creative and funky types who can come up with something grandiose and out of this world. I think reasonable and I plan practical. When I read this essay topic that said I could use any means to show my interests and achievements to my potential MBA classmates, I really did not know what to do. I was sure I did not want to just WRITE an essay, but beyond that I was clueless.

I asked a few friends for ideas, and I browsed the net. I read that people had sent photo albums and collages, even cereal boxes! This sounded interesting but not my style (as I said, I go with handy and smart).

So, I toyed with the concept of using a T-shirt (a brand new one, as clearly indicated by the university) to showcase my talents, qualities, etc. But what exactly…

SOS-ed friends and relatives. A few of them gave some witty and many vague ideas, nothing too direct and helpful. I had to salvage from their scattered points and do something that looked “Anuja”.

(Thanks Sibi, Denis and Ajay for your inputs. Appreciate it.)

Abba, ever the Devil’s Advocate, managed to scrap all the ideas that I was bouncing off on him, but he could not give me even one constructive point to work on. (Thanks, anyway. For a lot of things. I’m forever indebted.)

The point being, when you desperately need help, there’s few people who will be willing to be of assistance. Frustrating, but true.

Even after I put in a thousand efforts and came up with a piece that looked outstanding to me (from an objective perspective), there were hardly any people to make me feel good about it! I borrowed Dad’s pen to jot a poem on the rear, and when I invited him to look at it, he said in a pompous tone, “Isn’t the pen nice? All my friends keep asking me to get them one.” I looked at him dumbfounded. What about my hard work and impeccable script?

I called a friend and proudly displayed my kaarigari to him. As luck would have it, we happened to have a skirmish (a very stupid one, if I may add) right before he saw the T. Obviously, his anger meant more to him than my intense need for feedback. And he walked out after poring over my work without even a "Hmm" or "Wow!" or "This is cool!" or anything to that effect. I felt awful... With friends like these, who needs enemies?!!


I thought Abba would be more thoughtful. If not, Ammi was always there.

Mistake.

I carefully towed my craft from my home to theirs and opened it with suppressed delight. I watched their faces as they read through all the matter and saw the visuals.

And then Abba opened his mouth; I was barely breathing.


"Don't you think," I cringed... "this could be less boastful?"


"I've just written the truth - my achievements in school and college, at work, outside..."


"I know."


"And then I pursued modelling so a few snaps, and my personality traits."


"Ya."


"And my interests and hobbies..."


"Hmm."


"It's all true."


"Ya, but should it not be more modest?"


"Would they accept me if I projected a mediocre picture of myself?"

"I don't know. It's my opinion. If you don't like it, just ignore it..."


Sigh.


I wish he'd said something nice before he said this. Don't people know that when you give feedback, you always use the Sandwich technique : Good-Bad-Good? Or am I asking for too much? How can you so completely disregard somebody's honest effort and intention?


I'm feeling truly horrible man. I seem to be surrounded by idiots who have no emotional intelligence. Missing my mom... She's the one who peps me up so well and flatters me no end (and that irritates me as well at times when I'm looking for criticism. But she loves me ya... Forgiven a thousand times over.)


And yet again I think why EQ is not made a compulsory subject in school...
Shall come up with a test one of these days, just so you know where you stand and where you go wrong...


And...


I know my work's good... whether anyone appreciates it or not...


(I hate my approval-seeking nature!!)


But I'm GOOD... and there's no changing that.


Love,
Princess